Canada Goose
/Gentlemen,
It appears our neighbors to the north are starting to piece together our plan to destabilize the nation and capitalize on the vast stockpiles of maple syrup and beaver pelts. While the decision to name our genetically engineered cybergenic super-villain fowl after the country seemed to have the desired results at first, it would seem they are becoming disquieted by this now. This individual, JK Brickworks, has gone so far as to reverse engineer the drive mechanism and is now sharing this information publicly. It seems we have no choice but to move to stage two, and implement the fire breathing and laser vision protocols. The syrup must flow.
Respectfully,
Lt.-Gen. Stanley Buchannon, Special Ops
Dept of Subversion
USSDNS
LSB/EW